bump in the night

a dream that you called me and asked me what type of car i drive.

i said - one of those little minis (even though that is not remotely what i drive)

you said - that’s perfect! we need someone to pick iggy pop up from the airport and entertain him for a few hours till the stage is ready for him.

i said - i’d love to, but i don’t know how to drive.

you said - can you fake it? you can sit there and we will guide you to the venue by remote control.

i said - i don't like to lie.

you said - if you don't tell him you are driving then you are not lying if you sit there and you are not.

i said - what if i crash?

you said - what if you don't?

What Happens Next

I write this now and you are still here, in Melbourne, and most likely only a suburb away from me here, at home, with you on my mind. I picture you at your house-sit, sitting with a bag partly packed, or mostly packed, and maybe you have your heart all tied up, or maybe your heart has already flown on ahead.

I have been thinking about you constantly lately, and have had more time to do so being stuck indoors and disallowing myself any distraction. I know that I will kick myself as soon as you leave, for not having spent every waking minute with you and not forcing myself up and out to be there with you.

In fact I already am.

So yes, I have been thinking about you busying yourself to go, and have been missing you like mad and thinking about the things that best prepare us for what happens next.

For you this is a checklist of things to do and prepare and secure for your adventure, and for me this is how best to keep part of you here with me, even long after your take off and landing and relocation. Of all the things I want to keep I think of your words, your beautiful heart, your incredible mind, and our friendship.

I don't know why things happen when they do, or how, and whether we will them this way, in some way, or rather if they occur chaotically and unpredictably, and in this way perhaps our futures are as fickle as our pasts. But I love whatever it was that brought us together.

I am so glad you found me right when I found you.